It’s 2042

The year is 2042,

Google just gives you random made up facts when you refresh the page.

Facebook sends you hundreds of happy birthday text from unknown numbers daily.

Ryan Reynolds and Hugh Jackman have just launched an Only Fans.

Tim Walz and Joe Rogan host a popular podcast about deer hunting.

You still eat bread, although it’s fallen out of fashion, because Jeff Bezos sends it to you in exchange for feet pics.

The Mets own The Washington Post.

It’s 2042,

Taylor Swift and Beyoncé are a couple now.

Keith Richards is the oldest living person.

Rolling Stone Magazine is owned by a CBD company.

Remote work is normal, but so are 16 hour days.

Elon Musk made it to Mars, the video of him bursting into flames is a popular meme.

Jake Paul is a moderate governor over the “disputed lands” in what was once called Berkeley.

It’s 2042,

A.J. from the Costco guys is now the company’s CEO; he made the hot dog $10.

Your wife has a podcast, where she makes fun of your weird teeth; it gets 8 million downloads a month.

An AI of Ruth Bader Ginsburg now presides over all divorce courts in the US.

The “just don’t wipe” movement is up to 2 million people, 25% of the number who listen to your wife’s podcast.

Guys it’s 2042,

Baby Yoda is starring in a reboot of Home Alone.

The Florida Teachers Union is fighting to keep books in schools.

The new Lord of the Rings movies are out, and Gandalf has huge knockers, but no one says anything.

Chappell Roan is driving a Ford Branco in a Hertz commercial.

The number one ketchup brand is MrBeast’s. Zendaya runs a cult now.

Simone Biles is Secretary of Health and Human Services.

It’s 2042…

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